Category: Memory

11/5/09 Day 16

This morning I’m watching the first snowfall from our dining room window.  It’s not amounting to much, which is good because I have some appointments this afternoon, but it still gets me in the mood.  I love the change of seasons, whatever time of year it is.  I feel really close to normal today.  I just cleaned…


Waiting: a memory

As time moves closer to the end of chemo, we move closer to more scans.  B and I experienced some massive anxiety junk waiting for the ultimate scan that told us that this was not metastatic disease.  Our oncologist is very straight with us, which we appreciate.  When she first met with us in mid…


He said “that would be magic” and I said “I believe in miracles”.

Understanding what we were contending with took some time.  The short story is that our surgeon pegged it right from the start and this was seconded by the surgeon in NYC from whom we sought a second opinion.  The longer story is that I underwent an MRI, a CT scan and a bone scan in one day,…


Telling Family

For the first few days in Tucson, the only people who knew about my diagnosis were my surgeon, my primary care doc, B, S (the friend I was visiting in AZ) and I.  After the visit, I attended a work related summit at a very luxurious resort.  It was from that spot that I called…


Telling the kids

The doc said I’d hear the results of the biopsy Friday, two days before I left for Tucson.  She called me at the end of A’s softball practice.  I think it may have been more difficult for her to tell me than it was for me to hear.  I don’t know when it happened, but…


Off to Tucson

I found out the biopsy results while B was on a week long trip to Alaska.  My surgeon called Friday at 7pm telling me it was breast cancer.  I went to A’s softball tourney the next day and flew out to a pleasure/business trip in Arizona at 6:50 am on Sunday.  No one but my…


Back from Alaska

Off to AK on a business trip.  16 years since my last visit.  This is a really cool trip.  I get to mix business with some pleasure and see some college buddies.   I knew something was up, but, not really the degree of seriousness.  “P” and I had back to back business trips, I…


Early thoughts

When breast cancer was confirmed after a biopsy, I immediately thought of a series of mandalas that I drew after I left Alaska.  This was 20 years ago at a time when I obviously needed self nurturance. The writing below image 1 suggests that I was feeling pretty vulnerable and needed to take better care…