It is day 7 cycle 12. That means tomorrow is day 1 of life after chemotherapy. Each day is one step closer to being farther from chemo. I’m grateful for chemo, and I’m grateful to be getting away from it.
I was just reading about nail issues during chemotherapy. Paclitaxel (Taxol), as any chemotherapy drug, is known for certain side effects. I was wondering if I was experiencing early signs if Peripheral Neuropathy, but have ruled that out for now. As I researched what could be going on, I have come to feel very grateful that I may recover from what I’m experiencing. Here is some information that has been helpful to me:
Paclitaxel is a chemotherapy drug that is given for breast cancer. Also called Taxol®, it is part of the drug class taxanes, which includes docetaxel (Taxotere®) and Abraxane®, which are made from Yew trees (genus Taxus).
Nails may darken or turn yellow, become brittle and crack easily. Six or more high-dose cycles of taxanes may cause nails to fall off. Dark or light lines (Beau’s lines) may develop across the width of some of your nails. Nails may develop a concave, spoon-like shape (koilonychia). Infections under your nails are also possible. If your nails are becoming loose, they may become quite painful. In some instances blood may collect under nails and cause them to fall off. (There was a picture of this, but I’ll spare you.)
I just feel for people ya know? The medicine that takes care of one serious thing, makes one either sick or in pain or even disfigured to a certain degree. I have been very fortunate in this regard.
My hands are something I’ve always liked, and as my nails started to change in very subtle ways during this treatment, I’ve tried to keep up with TLC. The way I have been effected is that I’m experiencing some tenderness in my nail beds. I’m at an advantage because I’ve never used artificial nails, nor do I put nail polish on. This might  have compromised my nails at the start.  It is recommended by some to use clear polish to help with nail strength during treatment with taxanes. I have not had nail strength problems, thankfully. They just hurt on occasion, and I have some subtle indentations which could be Beau’s lines, and one dark stripe down my index fingernail. Yay for herbs, good italian genes and a fairly healthy diet. I give these credit for my relative nail health. I also must credit my goofy family, katz and friends. That’s got to have SOMETHING to do with it, fer shure.
I’ve been aware of my own self consciousness of late.  My hands are not to blame, they actually look pretty normal. Sure, I’m still wearing doo rags (weird hair growth patterns and cold head are to blame), I do get tired of that, but I’m dealing. You may recall that I mentioned a friend for whom eyebrow loss was the most difficult to deal with. I know how valuable eyebrows are to the whole facial scheme, but I never thought about what it would be like to be without them. You know those eyebrows that make you say “WOW, how does he grow them like that?” Well right about now I’m cheering those bushy eyebrow growers on, and trying not to salivate in envy when I’m near them. I’m just so excited that my folicles will soon be in production again, it’s rediculous.
Stretching is always good, and I’m finding that the best place to keep stretching is in a nice warm shower. My range of motion is quite good at this point.  There is some sensation where there was not along the surgery areas.  I am aware that there will always be some numbness.  Scar massage and stretching extra on my left side are part of my regular routine at this point.
I think this week has gone well for me. I’ve felt remarkably well, taking care to chill out before I needed to. I think there is also psychological advantage of knowing that the chemical bath is over. I’m so excited about NOT having anything of that nature going into my body tomorrow.  Recently I’ve forwarded this blog address to others who know someone who is about to go through treatment. I feel excited at the possibility that maybe a bit of our story may educate or be helpful in some way. I also have noticed a feeling of humility in that it’s just our little story.
There will certainly be more installments in the “life after chemotherapy” chapter. I just wanted to get some of these thoughts down. We are now in the recover phase as we regain strength for radiation. I say we here because my family and loved ones are also recovering. The compassion fountain needs rejuvination too I’m sure.  Next milestone? The simulation is on March 9. Stay tuned!
Just hugs!
Hugs certainly accepted. Cyber hugs just don’t do it for me all the way. When’r we going to play???
I’m interested in where you think “keeping your eye on the ball” fits into things like finger nails and eyebrows.
It’s a good question R. I will just say what I’m thinking. I think the body stuff can certainly act as a distraction and could pull a G.O. out of her/his track. I am excited at the possibility that my body can recover in these areas, and I am a witness to the recovery I suppose. I’m not yet running to the mirror each day to see if any sprouts have shot up where my eyebrows used to be. I am already seeing ‘recovery’ in my nails, I think.
Whether it is emotional or physical, mental or spiritual, “keeping your eye on the ball” to me means remembering that this will pass. Most of the time when I’m out and about I don’t think about the way I look. I’ll be writing more about what I’ve been up to and this will be discussed a bit.
Have I even addressed your comment??
Good answer. I think that no matter how focused you are on the major recovery issue, it is a positive thing to pay attention to the smaller stuff (which if you weren’t fighting cancer would be big stuff). Keeping the perspective that the short term changes are transitory is, as you say, the key to a good perspective. As usual, you have an handle on it.